My Job in the Lord

“Let me say this, brothers: 

flesh and blood cannot share 

in the Kingdom of God, 

nor can something that decays share 

in what does not decay. 

Look, I will tell you a secret — 

not all of us will die! 

But we will all be changed! 

It will take but a moment, 

the blink of an eye, at the final shofar. 

For the shofar will sound, and 

the dead will be raised to live forever, and 

we too will be changed. (Note: we changed, not raised)

For 

this material which can decay 

must be clothed with imperishability, 

this which is mortal must be clothed with immortality. 

When 

what decays puts on imperishability and 

what is mortal puts on immortality, 

then this passage in the Tanakh 

will be fulfilled: 

“Death is swallowed up in victory. 

The sting of death is sin; and 

sin draws its power from the Torah; but 

thanks be to God, who 

gives us the victory through 

our Lord Yeshua the Messiah!”

‭‭1 Corinthians (1 Co)‬ ‭15:50-54, 56-57‬ ‭CJB‬‬

My ex

Don’t know why this morning when I was showering, thoughts of my ex leaning on my support came into my thoughts. 

In his life, he has a very strong personality and most of time, he doesn’t need me. 

My first time to Sweden to met him in northern Sweden, he led me to do some sightseeing and drove from his work town towards Stockholm and then on the way to southern Sweden where his family is. 

Half way through, he turned to tell me he lost his way. So he ask me how. 27 years ago, GPS wasn’t developed yet. 

I asked him if he know the way back, he replied, ‘yes’. Then I told him to go to where he knows. Then he rerouted and we managed to reach his mum’s home. 

Another time in New Zealand, we visited southern NZ and in such a neighbourhood, the houses are built on very steep slopes. 

My ex was contemplating whether to drive up the slope. He asked me if he should. I questioned him if the car we rented had the power to go up. He replied, ‘should be’. Then I told him to do it. He controlled the car slowly and we managed to reach the top of the slope. It was a nice conquest. 

Another time he was having a work issue that he was at his weakness, I comforted him and he was comforted. 

These were the only 3 times that he needed me; in those years together. 

So, such a strong self man, that can function by himself most of the time, he doesn’t really need me. 

Husband finances

Last night, my friend claimed that I looked to certain guy because of provisions. 

To a certain extend, currently I do have to depend on ex as I yet to start on Lord’s job. 

When I am highly blessed, then guy’s financial is not a consideration anymore but more of compatibility.

Do I really need to go for the one who like me? Not necessarily. 

Why? Do I know him in person? No. 

So even I do know him previously by his ways, to me, I do not know his real person actually. 

So does it means that I need to stick by him, not that necessary. 

Why?

Consider his families so against this relationship, do I look forward to have them as my in laws?

That fact that I like ex partly was his side of the family was far far away. So I won’t have in laws problem. Plus ex disallowed them to meddle into the family was another plus factor. 

I don’t like Asian traditions where in laws meddle into the family. 

And if I married, I know the in laws become part of the family. And I don’t fancy it when they are not friendly.

So, even he really love me, each of us grow up from a different backgrounds and between us, there are frictions. Plus the unfriendly family, it’s not a rosy situation for me.

So, it’s not a firm yes or no for this situation. 

And I don’t care who you are. If there are too much problems, why do I have to jump in? I am not so stupid. 

In Christ term, if too much problem, it’s mean a close door. So if Lord close, why should I open? And if Lord opens, then I go through.

This my stand and my thoughts currently. I am not one that look to riches, power nor status to lift up myself. I don’t need all these. Amen. 

The big bomb

The bible mention of an action like that of a very huge stone being thrown into sea and the result from it. 

In the bible, also mention a nasty guy planned to kill all the Jews by building a very tall hanger in the book of Esther. In the end, he suffered.

So this plan by Iran, building an insane level of uranium, seem like this is going to be a big bomb for that region. As what the bible says. 

Let see when it would happen. Only Abba Father knows.

Is marriage possible

My counsellor post me this question when I met her yesterday.

I looked at money and told her possible. But I know money is the root of all evil and wants is a endless well. 

So in the natural, nothing is possible. 

Those ancient lovers most didn’t work out.

My friend ask if I will choose ex again. 

Now after 12 years, whatsoever feeling that I might have for him is totally gone. Also, my girl has grown up. So her factor also gone. 

Plus they both blocked me fully from their lives. How to have any feelings for them?

Anyway those ancient lovers had one common factor. God is not in their lives. So they had to go by human efforts.

It’s like what current opposition doing to me; be it spiritual attack or human effort, it will only lead to end in a dead end. 

So is it still possible?

Well, I don’t know what will happen eventually. 

But I know I have thousand year of job to do for the LORD. 

And all Christians will renewed in youth, corrupt become incorruptible, mortal will become immortality. 

And GOD is LOVE and I am HIS Beloved. 

What will happen is not within my control, nor my feelings or whatsoever. 

I cast this relationship with the families and friends and those involved to YOUR NAILED PIERCED HAND. LORD JESUS, there is nothing that I could do and there is nothing they could do. We are all impossible. 

However, in YOU, LORD, YOU will work all things out for YOUR GOODNESS; for YOUR NAME Sake. YOU are I AM and in YOU, nothing is I M Possible. 

Thank You, LORD JESUS. 

Btw, thank you. My centre management wasn’t disturbed. From my understanding lately, many are leaving. 

My Centre

The centre where I live, there was a lady that would scold all the members staying here and specially me. 

When I cooked for the members to enjoy food, she will say I don’t ‘listen’ to her. 

She even said I’lured’ others to eat my food. 

When I don’t cook, she scolded I don’t care about certain of her people here. 

She got stronger and even scolded the councillors, Health care workers, she laughed at a married staffs here about how the man like his fat wife because of her status. 

Who ever she encountered she scolded. 

She used dirty unclean sexual words that drew the ugliness of sex, sexual organs and even condemned us having many dirty men against me. 

She just scolded and scolded that we who stayed the same level with her did not get our peace. 

For our sake for our mental health, centre had been asking her to discharge but she refused but just be a nuisance to everyone. 

To counter her nasty scolding, one member on the radio loudly to drown her voice. 

It’s a on going fighting. She imagined and talked loudly that one members was flirting with the HCA male staff where the member just sat near the counter. 

That member gave her a slap for demeaning her. 

All in all, she has the ability to scold at the top of her voice from day break to the night. 

For our sake, centre managed to find a loophole to discharge her. 

However, her people here became not happy. One shot a email to the top MP in this GRC where the centre is. 

The councillor, who was in charged of her is promoting. 

The Residential manger is asked to quit for helping us to find peaceful life. 

I was terrified so much by her scolding that even after she left, everyday I passed by the chair she sat to scold loudly, she is like still there. 

My mental health was affected so much by her even though I choose to ignore her scolding but just live under the scolding, condemnation. 

It was this week, after she left for 2 weeks that I feel better. 

But the GRC did something for the member who complained about the centre who removed this mental terror. 

There are movements in the staff office. Her councillor is going to promote to take over the residential manager place. 

The Residential manager was told to leave for bringing peace for the sick members here. 

I am speechless at what the people of this GRC could do to a mental health centre. It’s as if we should not get better and moved into the society; we should be condemned and live under terror. 

The centre should not do the right thing to promote health to us. But should let terror to demeaning our lives. 

I am speechless. 

One thing I noticed about the people they sent to live here. They all scolded sexual organs in their distress. 

Are they a group of lowly people that don’t know how to express their anger in none sexual way?

Anyway, guess these are the true selves of this group of people. 

Hiaz