At 1:35am Singapore time, Sunday had just gone by. It was the hardest day of my life to have ex bringing his girlfriend into this apartment as if it was a natuaral thing to do. I kept my cool and chose to ignore them and got along my morning routine; said a 'Hi' to the girlfriend and hugged Jc and off I went.
I looked to Lord to deliver me and kept me cool. He did that till worship songs started and I was tearing even though I was singing to Him how Mighty He is. As I leaned on Him, my tears carried the problem off me that I stopped crying and the heart felt lighter after the first song.
Through the next few worship song, I leaned closer and closer to Him till I was smiling and casting the whole of me to Him. Previously, I would pray that I cast myself to Him fully so that I could be a stronger me. Today, I prayed that I cast myself fully to Him so that a full Him come out to be Him. Glory Glory! Amen Amen!
As what I have trusted Lord, Lord poured out His Grace strongly on me and let me know I am shifting soon. Lord said this is a critical time. If He delay, my family will be broken forever. He has to come fast to rescue me and move me to the promised land so that whatever I speak of what He would do in my life would become real. So far, ex n Jc took this as my imagination!!! But Faith comes before the real thing, this is what they could not get it.
Lord said with the manifestation and the renewal of youth, I will be able to get ex back! From great anger with him this morning, I prayed to Lord to take away my emotion and feelings and I was able to have a light heart to talk to ex again. Glory Glory!
Abba is good, when things with ex and his girlfriend looked pretty certain and Jc clicked well with her kids, Lord wants to come fast so that I could get them back with me again. Glory Glory!
I am so glad to have Lord on my side. He sees all things and are able to make plan for things to happen. I am so happy and so comforted. Lord even told me to get durian to comfort myself and make sure I have enough cash to buy them. Glory Glory! Amen Amen!
Even when things do not look good to me, He Grace sure is abundance to turn things around. I find ex's girlfriend standing a distant away as ex n me meet. Somehow, she knows not to offend me! Glory Glory! Amen Amen!
Lord further comfort me with stories of Sid Roth stiff neck family could believe in Jesus, anybody could too. He also got a mafia that came to Lord to show no matter how bad the situation, He could turn it well for His Glory. The last story was a man who was so depressed that his dad was jailed that he dropped out of school to become a cook and had cooked for countries head and celebrities. Even his family case was so broken and he hardly school, Lord blessed him such a great cook that people have to book months ahead to eat at his restaurant!!! Glory to Jesus!
From all these stories, I know the stiff neck ex will come to Jesus and Jc will be lead to study and be a good girl. His Grace is enough for everything when nothing seem to work! Glory Glory! Amen Amen!!!!
Monday, July 16, 2012
Saturday, July 14, 2012
The New Plan
I did not know that ex might be interested in my jewellery till I got uneasy in the heart and went to check my collection and found some of them were missing.
Last Sunday, I confronted ex as he has free access into this house every Sunday. He sent Jc to her gym at 2pm and picked her at 4pm, giving himself of 2 hours to access this apartment without anybody notice. Of course, as usual, whatever he did to me, he will deny.
Jc checked with him why I was angry with him and he lied to Jc that I am paranoid and I refuse to take my medicine. Jc told her school cousellor about it and then showed me the message after she returned from school. I was really mad that ex told a lie and Jc believed in him. I have to sms the cousellor to explain its not I am paranoid but my gold was missing.
Lord told me that my condition in this home has risen to critical level. Ex used black magic to attack me and when I got angry and sms him, he kept those messages. Even the recent happening I also messaged him. Lord said he used those smses as evidents to apply for court order to remove me out of this house.
He had wanted me to shift out early of this year but I refused. He promised to let me stay till end of next year when Jc finishes her primary school for me to agree to all the divorce agreements, but now he is not honouring his promise to me. He wanted to take my name out of this house but I knew his tricks and I refused to agree. He increased the spiritual attack but Praise Jesus I am still alive! Now he is using the law against me.
Lord told me that He will not let me kick out of this house. His Plan for me is good. Surely no harm nor disgrace will come to me. Ex has refused to answer my sms since 3 days ago. He even get Jc wanting to stay with daddy. Things are not bright on my end but Jesus is BIG BIG GOD and His Plan for me is GOOD!
No wonder ex totally ignore me when he came over to fix up a back rest for Jc's bicycle. His plan is in the moving that he could totally ignore me.
I thought only Israel would face eviction from their land, I am facing such eviction order too. Lord said the lawyer has submitted the case for the queue. Lord told me I will be out before it reach the court. I am trusting Him for His Perfect Plan for me.
As you see, why I was so depressed when Lord told me He is bringing him back to my life! I would have kick him far far away if not for Lord! My heart was so hard in rejecting him that Lord gave me a dream this morning of him departing from Singapore forever. I was not even moved. In the dream, I saw 2nd sis bid farewell to him. As my heart was not moved, Lord inner voice reminded me that he was going and at that point, my heart soften at cannot see him anymore. When I woke up this morning, the hardness in me was gone! Glory Glory!
I had seen Jc in agreeing with ex, has gone from me to stand with ex. I was so angry that day that I told her if she sided with her daddy, she could jolly well go to him and I want her nomore. Yes, I was hurt by her constant use of the tone and the words that ex had talked to me, on me. With ex talking so nasty I am already sick of him. With Jc talking the same way, I want to run away forever. I want both of them to be out of my life!
See how devil worked his plan into my heart. But when Lord softened me down, I asked Jc to hug me this morning in bed. She was hesitant, but I opened the way for her to come to my side and she did. I told her I thought that she does not care for me anymore when she agreed with her daddy, I told her she is my daughter and I always love her. With that understanding, she is more in peace with me. Glory Glory!
I wonder how I am going to survive the next few coming Sundays but surely, I know Lord will deliver me out of all harms. Glory Glory! Amen Amen!
Update (15/7/2012):
To test my patience, this morning, I was just out from shower and combing my hair to get ready for church and ex brought his girlfriend into the house. It like demonstrating this house is mine and I could do what I want to do.
It's like coming into my territory and my whole body reacted to the shock. I sat down to feed my Spirit Man and Lord told me he took the house as his and tried to show his mightiness. Just like Abraham complained to Abimelech in Genesis 21:25, I know one day in the near future the table will be turn against him! At this moment, I kept my cold.
Lord, thank You for lifting me up again in the worship! I am very thankful for this peace of heart again! Glory to You, Abba!
Last Sunday, I confronted ex as he has free access into this house every Sunday. He sent Jc to her gym at 2pm and picked her at 4pm, giving himself of 2 hours to access this apartment without anybody notice. Of course, as usual, whatever he did to me, he will deny.
Jc checked with him why I was angry with him and he lied to Jc that I am paranoid and I refuse to take my medicine. Jc told her school cousellor about it and then showed me the message after she returned from school. I was really mad that ex told a lie and Jc believed in him. I have to sms the cousellor to explain its not I am paranoid but my gold was missing.
Lord told me that my condition in this home has risen to critical level. Ex used black magic to attack me and when I got angry and sms him, he kept those messages. Even the recent happening I also messaged him. Lord said he used those smses as evidents to apply for court order to remove me out of this house.
He had wanted me to shift out early of this year but I refused. He promised to let me stay till end of next year when Jc finishes her primary school for me to agree to all the divorce agreements, but now he is not honouring his promise to me. He wanted to take my name out of this house but I knew his tricks and I refused to agree. He increased the spiritual attack but Praise Jesus I am still alive! Now he is using the law against me.
Lord told me that He will not let me kick out of this house. His Plan for me is good. Surely no harm nor disgrace will come to me. Ex has refused to answer my sms since 3 days ago. He even get Jc wanting to stay with daddy. Things are not bright on my end but Jesus is BIG BIG GOD and His Plan for me is GOOD!
No wonder ex totally ignore me when he came over to fix up a back rest for Jc's bicycle. His plan is in the moving that he could totally ignore me.
I thought only Israel would face eviction from their land, I am facing such eviction order too. Lord said the lawyer has submitted the case for the queue. Lord told me I will be out before it reach the court. I am trusting Him for His Perfect Plan for me.
As you see, why I was so depressed when Lord told me He is bringing him back to my life! I would have kick him far far away if not for Lord! My heart was so hard in rejecting him that Lord gave me a dream this morning of him departing from Singapore forever. I was not even moved. In the dream, I saw 2nd sis bid farewell to him. As my heart was not moved, Lord inner voice reminded me that he was going and at that point, my heart soften at cannot see him anymore. When I woke up this morning, the hardness in me was gone! Glory Glory!
I had seen Jc in agreeing with ex, has gone from me to stand with ex. I was so angry that day that I told her if she sided with her daddy, she could jolly well go to him and I want her nomore. Yes, I was hurt by her constant use of the tone and the words that ex had talked to me, on me. With ex talking so nasty I am already sick of him. With Jc talking the same way, I want to run away forever. I want both of them to be out of my life!
See how devil worked his plan into my heart. But when Lord softened me down, I asked Jc to hug me this morning in bed. She was hesitant, but I opened the way for her to come to my side and she did. I told her I thought that she does not care for me anymore when she agreed with her daddy, I told her she is my daughter and I always love her. With that understanding, she is more in peace with me. Glory Glory!
I wonder how I am going to survive the next few coming Sundays but surely, I know Lord will deliver me out of all harms. Glory Glory! Amen Amen!
Update (15/7/2012):
To test my patience, this morning, I was just out from shower and combing my hair to get ready for church and ex brought his girlfriend into the house. It like demonstrating this house is mine and I could do what I want to do.
It's like coming into my territory and my whole body reacted to the shock. I sat down to feed my Spirit Man and Lord told me he took the house as his and tried to show his mightiness. Just like Abraham complained to Abimelech in Genesis 21:25, I know one day in the near future the table will be turn against him! At this moment, I kept my cold.
Lord, thank You for lifting me up again in the worship! I am very thankful for this peace of heart again! Glory to You, Abba!
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