The Last Night

Tonight probably the last night that I am in this apartment. Well, there is certainly no joy even though I know I will be richly blessed. Family love is important in our life!!!

Ex, whom had relied on me to guide Jc in her study, was at a lost when I told him if the info that I supposed to pass to him cannot be pass on Sunday night as I won't be here anymore! He was kind of lost but he shook it off as I have yet to clear my things. Then he comforted himself.

Jc, whom had wanted me to go away so that her daddy could come here, was quiet, and also don't know how would she feels if I am not around. I could understands why.

Long ago, I had a friend, whom I called often just to chat. For a period of time, forgot the duration, probably 5 months or more, she disappeared; in relationship. When she broke off with her boyfriend, she called me to get me to call her again!!! But since she didn't appreciate me in the first place, I did not call her anymore.

When I am around, maybe the comfort level I provided is so quiet and smooth that sometimes, life made easy for him, he does not feel it. But when the reality hit home that I am going away almost forever, then it's like something missing.

As I packed my stuff, I saw a photo of me carrying baby Jc, tears started to roll down my eyes. She is one I cared with endurance, from the initial 2 months of feeding her hourly to the 3rd or 4th month then every 3 hourly.

She was a shy girl that I needed to comfort her as she clung to me tightly as other cousins played. It took her years to open up to them!!! Since 8yrs old, she had been going down to the play ground to play and mixed around that built her up socially. But in the process, she feels she could be independent and don't need me!!!

When she was unsecured of her daddy's love, she ran to me for comforts. But now she had her daddy's love and Rosy's kids to play with, she has forgotten me. But last night she said the only thing she like from me was the massage on her back as she sleeps. She said her daddy's wasn't as comfortable as mine. Glory Glory!!! Amen Amen!!!

I am supposed to pack and leave by this weekends. Lord promised to deliver me and my siblings from the different sources of pressure!!! So this blessing by the Lord is very important. Glory Glory!!! Amen Amen!!!

Lord knows that I would be alone and promised to bring the one He arranged to me. Glory Glory!!! As I step into the unknown, I am glad that my future partner is there waiting for me. Glory Glory!!! Amen Amen!!!

Even the confrontation with KF, is tomorrow. Brother was excited and his mind is running with ideas on how to place mum in next!!! Since hospital wanted mum to be discharged by 19th Feb 2013. The doctor really called brother a few times to make sure we arrange an exit for mum!!!

I thank Lord that when answer is bleak, He has the solution. Glory Glory!!! Amen Amen!!!! Brother and I agreed that previously when mum was with either of us, we never talk cost. But for KF, even before mum go to his house, he is talking about maid cost, reno cost etc etc....

He even laugh at us to be the hero to provide an answer, but he expect the funding from the rest of us!!! That is how calculative he had became!!! When we get blessed, he will surely knows. Glory Glory!!! Amen, Amen!!!

Tonight I stared aimlessly at the screen while eating melon seeds. This the only joy that I need no one to share with me. Glory Glory!!! Even though I am sad to be leaving this place, I know future is a better place and I am pleased with Lord for all His Arrangement!!! Glory Glory!!! Amen Amen!!!