With the recent love scenario coming to an end on my side, there is one thing that I never really noticed that was absent from my relationship with ex.
In the recent case about V, in the spirit, I was prompted if I like to be fondle!!! When I got this question, through dictionary, I found out it means caressing!!! With this revelation of what is it? Then I realised what I had been missing out from my relationship with ex, as he claimed that he really loves me in the beginning!!!
I realised since day one I met him till I married him, he never fondle me before!!! The only time he did that were those 2 times when he was drunk!!!
Then this truth hit me hard that he never love me at all!!! This was one question I questioned him in frustration at times over the divorce when I found out more about he didn't love me!!! I questioned why did he marry me even though he didn't love me? He claimed he did! I could not validate it till this revelation that he never fondle me at all!!!
What I know is fondling is part of the expression of loving the woman by the man. To be not doing it at all, shows his lack of love and only looking for being his source, especially he claimed man don't have any toys to relieve themselves!!!
The more I know this, then I realise it is out of question to even consider a reunion with him!!! He is not into marriage with any girls, he just want a source of release only, minus all the responsibilities!!! That's why I was the one handling them all and I was feeling lonely then!!! He always used his work, his meeting and even his oversea travel as excuse!!!
With this revelation, I now am sure all that he claimed that I was is not really I was. More of a loveless relationship in manifestation and loneliness is the result!!! He knows all the trick to stir a woman up for his purpose!!! But more than that is emptiness!!!
It were proven even in those other girls that had relationship with him, all ended unhappy!!! And when they were hurt, they can't hurt him as he didn't care, so in the end, the girls tried to hurt Jc and her thing!!!
It is sad, all from he never learn what love is and just selfishly wanted his needs satisfied!!! Emotional department is shut long ago from his parents divorce at age of 5.
If he accepted Christ, Lord can do the miracle as He had done with brother-in-law, whom also had a sad case when he was a kid!!! Lord has grown his love for my sister, Su, that Su claimed he is a changed man now!!! Glory to Jesus!!! Amen Amen!!!
Anyway, now I have decided to wait upon The Lord to renew my body so that it is good!!! I will wait for the blessed man from The Lord and will reject temptation!!!
Now I know how to tell the difference! Lord said I passed the test!!! Glory Glory!!! Amen Amen!!!
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