Like most parents here in Singapore, I am concerned about Jc's study and gaining her knowledge. I know in Christ, knowledge is nothing but in this world, I cannot afford to let go of her in gaining her knowledge. The fact that she is not concerned in her study let me even more worry for her.
This is the area I find it hard to trust on Lord goodness and when I saw her love in her dancing and gymnastic, I wondered did Lord give her this talents to excel in this area instead of study!!! This 2 activities are her love and she would do all she could to do well in it. This is especially so for her dance!!!
Since P1, she had a hard time understanding. Imagine what I taught her she only could understand at the end of the year!!! Don't know is it because she was trapped in my tummy for 12 hours after the water bag had burst!!! I could not dilate, no matter how much contractions was artificially induced in me that I was pushed to have C-section in the end.
I received all the shame when others kids done their parents proud but Jc is a happy go lucky kid. Lord promised to upgrade her but it was a slow wait. Since I know Lord since she was K2 or was it K1, and she is P6 this year!!!
Last year, I see much maturity come upon her where her friends had mature since P3 onwards. With this I was hoping she could do better in P5 but this wasn't the case. The joke was, she was weak in her languages most and yet, she got better result in Chinese than English, her spoken language at home!!!
Recently, since start of this school year, she had been telling me her English Comprehension marks. It was at the amazing low of 2/20. But lately, she told me she got 6/20 and the last 12/20. This finally getting better result for Comprehension is amazing. As most time, her comprehension got many wrong, she will get a previous sentence as her answer as compared to the right answer!!!
Personally Comprehension was my weaker area, that is why I need to get Wisdom from Lord to understand Him, what He preaches through the Pastors!!!!
To add to the complication, she supposed to stop her school dance by March to prepare for the August Prelim and September PSLE (Primary School Leaving Examination). But she and a few other P6 were selected to dance in July for a street dance, guess for her Youth Festival. This would take up her Monday late afternoon time, after her compulsory school remedial, and the usual dance practice and also the March term break and the June holiday!!!
I am really unwilling for her to spend so much time on the dance, especially PSLE is coming very fast in September!!! But she die die want to go heart, I find it hard to reject her. I would need to trust the miracle hand of Jesus and His Wisdom, Understanding and even Memory to come through fully for her and to help her do the tests!!!
Lord promised to show me some results in her Prelim so that I will rest in Him. To know that currently, what she learn in school is level 1 and the doing of the past year paper from tuition is level 2, I have to depend on Lord wisdom to lead her to Level 3, which is how the PSLE paper is set!!!
Currently, I am a helpless mum that needs lots of Jesus Grace to pull her through!!! My trust in Him all these years but each time I see the results, my heart sink. This final one, Lord said He will manifest Himself fully for her.
Through ex's gf, I was reminded to Live a Let Go life!!! This was Pastor Prince preaching in 2004, I did not get to listen to this sermon but Pastor Prince had preached a lot in other sermons to fight into rest of Jesus Peace!!!
It is just a few months more, I am supposed to negotiate with Jc to give up her youtube and TV time, to gain her pass to do the dance. This is after talking to ex and he told me to do so. This is why I said this home, he is the one issuing the command and I am the executor!!!
Well, let see how things turn out!!! I do hope she do well for her Prelim and PSLE, and I hope I could bring her back to Sweden, Gothenburg, Liseberg Amusement Park!!! She went there last June, enjoyed so much that she wanted to return there again. I had wanted to go there but ex wasn't keen to bring me there long ago, before marriage.
There is a 1 week break for PSLE paper marking and I think this would be a good time to bring her there!!! Hopefully the winter time in the park is delayed so that she and me could enjoy most of the rides!!!
All these are my wishes and hopes!!! Only the Almighty God, My Abba Father, could fulfill with the Grace of Jesus and His Finished Work at the Cross!!! Through Christ Jesus, the Seed of Abraham, Father Abraham's Promises by God, could flow through and I, Jc and hopefully ex be reunited and be blessed. Glory Glory!!! Amen Amen!!!
Lord, I cast all these into Your Nailed-Pierced Hand and thank You that You will do it beautifully for the Glory of the Name of Jesus to be Glorified in our midst!!! Amen Amen!!!! I pray in the Name of Jesus!! Amen!!!
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